Positive Discipline
Why learn the Positive Discipline approach?
Whether you are in the home or in the classroom, it can feel impossible to meet the expectations of all the people watching and judging you in how you handle your children:
“You’re too strict!” or “You’re too permissive!”
“You need to punish bad behavior!” or “You need to create an incentive for kids to be good!”
“You can’t let your child be upset!” or “Let your kid cry until they stop on their own!”
Each person who gives you advice is well-meaning, in their own way. They base their judgements on their own upbringing, culture, and personal experiences– but it leaves your head reeling with self-doubt and a desire to know and do better for the children you love. You wonder, is there a “right” way to raise them?
The short answer is: no.
There is no one-size-fits-all solution to the challenges parents, teachers, and other caregivers face on a daily basis; however, there are tools we can use to better handle those challenges, and to foster desired life skills in our children.
In 2019, I attended a Positive Discipline experiential workshop for classroom educators. It fundamentally altered the way I viewed misbehavior in students, my own shortcomings, and how to approach living in community.
“It has been promised that children who experience the respective interaction outlined in [Positive Discipline] will learn self-discipline, cooperation, responsibility, resilience, resourcefulness, problem-solving skills, and other social and life skills for good character.”
- Jane Nelson, Positive Discipline
Positive Discipline is based on the research, philosophy, and teachings of psychologists Alfred Adler and Rudolf Dreikurs. It rejects punitive punishment, which creates a temporary motivation for better behavior based on shame and fear, and instead proposes we can help children (and ourselves) to do better through a lens of encouragement, choice, and commitment to personal growth.
As a “too nice” teacher, Positive Discipline gave me a way to overcome my conflict-aversion and permissiveness, to find the balance of “kind and firm” in managing my classroom. It’s been incredibly valuable to me, my students, and my school communities. Positive Discipline acknowledges the human desire for belonging and purpose, roots itself in mutual respect, and encourages us to embrace mistakes as opportunities for learning.
My belief in the effectiveness of Positive Discipline methods and my experience implementing them led me to undergo training to teach them to others, both in the classroom and in the home. If you’re a parent or caregiver wondering if Positive Discipline tools might work for you and your family, you can find out more details on the (add link) course page.
“The primary goal of Positive Discipline is to enable both adults and children to experience more joy, harmony, cooperation, shared responsibility, mutual respect, and love in their life and relationships.”
- Jane Nelson, Positive Discipline
New virtual cohorts begin every 6 weeks and have limited slots, so when you’re ready to dive in, make sure to sign-up for the Learning with Bluebell newsletter for enrollment notifications.
